Latest Quilt

Just wanted to post a picture of the quilt I finished. This pattern is called Pinapple Express. The blocks can be twisted around and give a completely different look with each twist.

Joyful, Joyful

Eden's biopsy results all came back normal! :) And she has gained over a pound! :)

The appetite stimulant medication is working, and the dr. also gave us a prescription to help her tummy heal faster. I think I've gotten rid of all things 'wheaty' in my kitchen and have been blessed enough to be able to replace most of those 'wheaty' items thanks to Kirstin's yard sale and an unexpected check. Isn't God wonderful?

In the meantime, I have been trying to keep busy so I won't worry so much and try to get caught up on all things I fell behind on around here during my surgeries. (It's quite embarrassing how behind I am in all things domestic, and otherwise.)

I actually finished my first quilt since Mary passed away (that felt REALLY good) and refinished an antique bookcase that belonged to my mom's mom. I've gotten most of the kitchen cabinets organized and hope to shampoo carpets next week. I've got a long list of 'stuff' to tackle, and I'm grateful to have the ability to do it! It feels great to use my feet!!! I've never been so happy to work.

Going to look for quilt pictures to post......

Eden, Of Course

We made it through our hospital stay yesterday. Everyone was so incredibly wonderful at the hopsital and the Lord gave Eden and I both great courage and joy through the entire process. (Seriously thanking Him for that.) We continued to recall Jesus' words to the apostles when their boat got caught in a mighty storm. We found it encouraging that Jesus didn't just say, "Do not be afraid", he said, "be of good cheer, do not be afraid". Isn't that lovely? I'm sure the apostles must have thought they might possibly drown!!! And Jesus tells them to be of good cheer!!! Why? Because nothing happens to us outside of God's plan. How could we NOT be of good cheer?

Eden did just fine through the anesthesia, although the drive home was a bit rough. She was throwing up blood on the way home and just felt nauseous. But by the end of the day she was back to her normal self.

The endoscopy showed irritation and inflamation at the end of her esophagus, just before it meets her tummy. The doctor biopsied that and the small intestine as well. The small intestine is where Celiacs have trouble, but hers seemed to look pretty good. The esophagus was another story.

We go see the doctor on St.Patrick's day to get the biopsy results. (That's also the day I find out if I can start walking again.)

In the meantime, Eden is still not eating very well, or drinking enough fluids, so we could still use prayer for that.

I've been reminding myself about the 'good cheer' verse, because I keep slipping into depression. My soul is so dark at seeing Eden losing weight and not eating. And nothing I say or do can get food or drink in her. And then I step into my kitchen, where EVERY time I go in there, I find something else that is wooden or plastic that I have to get rid of. (Yes, Tricia, I found out gluten doesn't wash out of those things. But now I know why she still had gluten in her diet.)

There have been many blessings throughout this though. My friend Kirstin stopped by last night, brought Eden a beautiful bouquet of flowers, and picked up a MOUNTAIN of kitchen goods that I have to toss. She priced them all for me and is selling them in a yardsale for me. She is doing all the work, and I can't even say what a blessing that is. The money she raises will go to start replacing some of that stuff.

Didn't intend to write this much! Ha!!! I never do!!! Off to try to get Eden to eat something.

Thank you so much for your prayers.

Eden

Just wanted to give a brief update on Eden.

Last week was horrible. I was supposed to make sure she was getting 3 meals a day AND drinking at least 4 Ensure Pluses a day. Thursday she got down a small bowl of cereal and then couldn't eat for the rest of the day. Same thing Friday. Knowing that she's losing weight and won't eat, makes me struggle with how to approach it all. Would a good mom force feed her kid? I don't think that's the answer, but then what is? For now, we pray and wait on God.

I called her doctor on Friday and they are going to contact her cardiologist for clearance to put her under a general. If they get the clearance, she will go in this Thursday up at Phoenix Baptist Hopsital for the upper GI. I was assured that the pediatric anesthesiologist they use is extremely good and works with VERY sick children all the time. I was glad to hear that.

I praise God for his promise in Hebrews that He will never leave us or forsake us. I know we are not going through this alone.

I was so terrified when she wouldn't eat, but yesterday was a much better day. She ate 3 small meals and drank 3 Ensure Pluses. This was a HUGE improvement, and very encouraging. Still short of where she should be, but yesterday was pretty close. I'm hoping she will continue to improve in this area.

The Lord is blessing us throughout this in mighty ways. I had a Pampered Chef party last week so that I could get a discount to replace part of my kitchen stuff. The most humbling, awesome, encouraging thing happened at that party. After everyone left, Stephanie showed me what everyone ordered. Every single person that came ordered something for ME, almost $300 worth of stuff for me. I am so blown away, and so moved. I just figured as people bought stuff for themselves I would earn discounts and credits for my own order. I was shocked and so grateful. What an incredible group of friends I have, and what a blessing from my Saviour. It was a truly beautiful surprise!

I was especially grateful for all the great PC stuff, as I found out I also have to throw out all of my tupperware, plastic, colanders, rolling pins, etc. Its really something to stand in my kitchen and look around at what I've accumulated over 20 years of marriage, to think about how I started with nothing in there, and now I throw it all out and start all over again, just like a newlywed. Its a bit overwhelming, but at least now I have my answer as to where Eden was still getting gluten in her diet, even though we were eating gluten-free.

My friend Kirstin is going to host a yard sale at her house so that I can sell all of this stuff. I tried to give it to friends, but they all insisted I sell it for cash for new stuff. For now most of it is piled up on the bed in the guest room. My mom is going to come over today and help me pack up the rest of it and then reorganize my kitchen. My mom is the organization queen. I have always helped my friends paint their houses, my mom has always helped her friends organize. Thank God for her!!! :)

Thank you for your continued prayers. I'll update as I can.

Love, hugs, and thank yous,
beth

Prayer, Please....

Hello My Friends,

I really haven't disappeared, or fallen off the planet. We are just having serious issues with Eden.

We had her appointment in Phoenix yesterday to see how much weight she gained since the last appointment 3 weeks ago. Unfortunately, she lost 1/2 pound. My baby is 8 and 1/2 years old, and weighs 43 pounds. This is not good. You can see each vertabrae and rib, and every other bone that is sticking out of her skin.

I am asking for your prayers. The doctor wants to give her a few more days to see how she does, and if there is no improvement, he will do the upper GI.

Since she was still getting wheat in her diet (still trying to figure out how), it could be that the Celiac has just destroyed her intestines, or some other organs, like it did to me. But we need to find out how to get weight on her.

While her heart condition is all cleared up, she does still have 3 heart murmurs. We have been assured that the murmurs are not in dangerous locations, but it is the heart issue that makes us so nervous to have her go under a general anesthetic.

Since the weekend is coming, Dana and I are leaning toward calling the doctor tomorrow and asking him to just do whatever we need to do. Today has not been good. Please pray for the Lord to give us wisdom as we try to do what is best for Eden. I am terrified to put her under, but she HAS to start gaining weight, NOT keep losing it. And please pray for her healing.

In the meantime, I have gotten rid of half my kitchen: deep fryer, grain mill, bread machine, pasta maker, wooden spoons, cutting boards, stoneware, etc, etc, etc. The cost of replacing this stuff is a little overwhelming, but fortunately, not all of it is necessary, so some of it can wait. I am having a Pampered Chef party tonight to try to get some of it for free, like the stoneware and cutting boards. My pastor's wife just started selling PC, and she is doing up a grand gluten-free dinner for us tonight. I'm looking forward to relaxing a little bit. I've been a bit uptight. :(

Got more to update on my grandpa and that scenario, but it will have to wait for now. Hope to come back and catch up on reading blogs, :) , and update on Grandpa.

We sincerely appreciate your prayers.

Love you guys,
beth

Mary, Beautiful Mary

Well, yesterday was the one year anniversary of my baby sister's murder. I have so many mixed emotions. Has it ALREADY been a year? It seems like it happened yesterday. Has it ONLY been a year? It feels like I haven't talked to her in decades. My feelings go back and forth, and back and forth.

Since she was killed in the middle of the night on Valentine's Day, as soon as all the Valentine's stuff started showing up, the emotions started to swirl. I had hoped to be in No. Cal with my family this weekend, but couldn't make it happen. I spent much of Sunday on the phone with my brother's and mom.

It's difficult to reconcile a 22 year old mother, sister, wife, daughter, being ripped away from us, but I do see the Lord's hand in it all. I'm telling you, if I didnt' see his hand, I'd be a basket case. Pure and simple. I praise God He holds me in His palm. That security cradles me, and I need that.

2008 was such a challenging year for us. In the midst of it, I was just bobbing my head up occasionally for air, trying to stay alive. Now, as I look back, I see God's hand sustaining me. We were already dealing with horrible health issues when Mary was killed. Her death was followed by 4 more deaths in a 6 month period, 5 total during that time frame. I remember telling Dana, it can't go on much longer, there's not that many live family members left after this.

When I look back, initially I wonder how I got through. (Not that I'm entirely through it yet.) And I see God's grace raining down on me. Family and friends that came along side us, and held us up. God gives us loved ones for a reason, and I can't imagine life without them.

I remember the dear friends that stayed on the phone with me for HOURS, crying and praying with me. Oh, how much I needed that.

Friends that helped talk me through the police investigation, the autopsy report, the idea of preparing her body for the funeral, picking out the casket.

I remember the drive to California to bury her, and being out in the middle of the desert and seeing a HUGE falling star. It was the size of my van, the most ENORMOUS falling star I ever saw, and it fell RIGHT in front of us. Dana and I both saw it, and were literally in awe, our mouths gaping. Neither one of us had ever seen ANYTHING like it. It was like God was showing us that He still had control, in spite of how things felt. And He sent us a rare thing of beauty, in the midst of ugliness.

Mary is gone. But God is good. He is altogether good.

I made it past the first one year mark. This is good. I know that Valentine's Day will sometimes be difficult for me, sometimes melancholy, sometimes just depressing. Father's Day is similar, since that's the day my Dad died. But, I'm not saying this lightly, I still have Christmas. I am grateful for that.

I want to thank you, my friends, for being there for me when I needed it. I thank God for you. If occasionally I seem a little quiet, please bare with me. While the Lord has brought me a looong way, I am still working through all of this, and it just takes time.

I love you!

My Hard Core Diet Coke Addiction

IS OVER!!!!!

I have been addicted, seriously addicted, to Diet Coke for YEARS. I've never been a coffee drinker, but there's been many a morning when I've started my day with Diet Coke and then just kept drinking it throughout the day and night.

Imagine my horror, when while lying in bed recovering from surgery to remove the numerous uterine polyps I had, I watch a documentary on Nutrasweet and learn that Nutrasweet/Aspartame CAUSES uterine polyps!

Nutrasweet increases your risk for brain tumor by 80%. 80%!!! I always just assumed that since it was approved by the FDA, it must be safe. HA! The documentary explained HOW it got through the FDA and its right up there with Monsanto. Disgusting!

The documentary was called "Sweet Misery". You can get it from Netflix or watch it on-line here: http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-566922170441334340

I am so grateful that I never let my kids have diet soda, or light yogurt, but I have let them chew sugar-free gum all their little lives. Not anymore.

The pain of that surgery will prevent me from ever drinking diet soda again. I am so angry about how Nutrasweet got approved by the FDA, I just had to share the movie link.

I'm done ranting now. :)

Have a great Valentine's Day!